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I am writing this post from the NICU room at the hospital. The past 6 days have been a whirlwind of emotions. We received the most wonderful gift less than a week ago and I have never been more in love. Our lives have changed for the better. I want to take a moment and share the story of how Finely was born and why she was born 6 weeks early.

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

My high-risk doctor had told me that if I had two more high blood pressures in a row that they would have to go ahead and induce me. They said baby looked good and since she was 34 weeks she would do really well. I wanted more than anything to meet my baby but at this point, I was getting really scared about my health. And let’s be honest, after 18 days in the hospital, I just wanted out. I had a couple of high BP’s during the course of the day. At one point my nurse went to call the doctor to see what we should do. He said that they were not crazy high yet so we were just going to wait it out. I was a little frustrated because my BP was getting higher but nothing was happening. However, I trusted my doctors and knew they were making the right call.

7:00 pm: Ryan walked into the room at 7:01 and put my food on the bed and I was just about to eat when my nurse walked in to take my BP. It was 200/109 which is seizure/stroke range. She took it again and it was even higher. At this point, I was getting very worried about my health. My nurse hurried out then three other nurses walked in and told me to put on the hospital gown because it was go-time. I immediately called my mom and barely had time to process what was going on. They rolled in a sonogram machine to see if she was breached (she was 3 days prior) and they hooked me up to the IV. Finley had tuned and was not breached anymore which we were excited about. However, my doctor told us that if they induced me, I would be in labor for about three days because my body was not ready to give birth this early. They needed to deliver ASAP because my BP was so high so the only option was for me to have a C-Section.

8:00 pm: I was rolled into the delivery room without Ryan. I kept telling myself that I was going to be okay. Going back there by myself was not my most favorite thing. My nurse was amazing and talked to me the whole time and she held my hands while they were doing the epidural.  The epidural was very painful and I started to feel very fatigued. Again, I kept telling myself I was going to be okay. But in reality, I wasn’t sure how I was going to make it through. My nurse put the medicine in and my whole lower body went warm an then it went numb. After I laid back down they brought Ryan in and I had a sigh of relief. Just having him there with me made me so much more relaxed. They started the procedure and it was a feeling like nothing before. I did not feel any pain but I felt them tugging and pulling. I kept waiting to hear my baby cry so that I knew she was out and healthy.

8:21 pm: Finley entered the world. I heard the doctor say “breath. breath.” That is the most terrifying thing to hear after giving birth. The umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck so she was not breathing right away. However, it did not take long for her to start breathing. This is another reason I am so glad we went ahead and did a C-Section. I was 100% okay with having a C-Section because it was all about me being healthy and baby being healthy. I did not care how I delivered, I just wanted Finley and myself to be okay. The first time I held my baby was a dream. A dream that I had dreamt about since I was a little girl. In fact, I feel like I am still dreaming. They let me hold her for a few minutes before taking her to NICU. The hardest part was that I did not get to see her for 24 hours after giving birth. My BP was so high, so after my surgery that put me on magnesium so I would not have a stroke. I could not leave my bed and Finley was in the NICU so we were apart the first 24 hours. The only thing that made that bearable was knowing that her NICU nurses were amazing and knowing that her daddy was in there with her any chance he got.

9:00 pm: I sat in the recovery room and looked at Ryan. My first thought was “what just happened”? Earlier that night, I didn’t know I was having a baby. And there I was, 2 hours later, in the recovery room as a new mom. The whole process was so fast. I still can’t believe it. However, we are so blessed that she is here and that she is healthy! We love our Finley so much!

xoxo,

Alyssa Littlefield

Going on day 13 of our hospital stay. Each day is different but each day is one day closer to meeting our daughter. I am not going to lie, I was very frustrated my first week in the hospital. Actually, if I’m being honest, I woke up today more frustrated than I have been. Each day we got different news and each day I got my hopes up on going home or delivering. I have been diagnosed with preeclampsia. Deep down I felt like somehow it was my fault I was here. I felt guilty. Like maybe if I hadn’t worked so hard or if I ate better. But the reality is that we do not know what causes it but we do know that comes from the placenta. It has nothing to do with anything that the mother did or could have done differently.

I know Ryan and I hear many different things at many different times throughout the day. But we understand that the doctors are doing their best to monitor me and baby. My case of preeclampsia is a little tricky. In order to cure my preeclampsia, the placenta has to be removed. Well, that means to deliver the baby, however, they want the baby to keep cooking for a little while longer. So, it’s a fine line between wanting the placenta out but wanting baby to stay in.

As of today, I am 34 weeks which is a big milestone in pregnancy. Finley will be pre-term but 34 weeks is a good week to deliver. The doctors would prefer that she stay in a little longer, but for my safety, they have considered delivering at 34 weeks. So we will see! It could be this week or it could be at 37 weeks. It all depends on my blood pressure. My high-risk doctor has said the next time that I have two crazy high blood pressures then they’ll induce me right away. So it could be any day now! I am on blood pressure medicine so my BP may be regulated and stay normal for a while. We just never know!

We do know that there is a reason my doctor has not induced me yet. Some doctors have said that if I was their patient they would have already induced me. I have been praying that The Lord will give my doctor wisdom on when to deliver. My doctor has not made that call yet, so we know that it is not the right time. There is a reason why Finley needs to stay in a little longer. The Lord already knows her birthday and when she will make her debut.

Thank you for your prayers!

xoxo,

Alyssa Littlefield

Hi Friends! I wanted to take a  minute to update everyone on what has been going on. First off, thank you from the bottom of our hearts for all of the prayers and messages. We have been so blessed by every prayer, kind message, and encouragement.

So, each day is different. Some days we think we are going home and some days we think we’ll be here until we deliver. It all depends on how my blood pressure is. My actual due date is January 26 so I am currently at 33 weeks. However, my doctor said that I will not be going past 37 weeks. So the latest Finely will be here is the first week of January. (If she lasts that long/if my blood pressure stays normal) 37 weeks is full term so she will be ready to go at 37 weeks. Weeks 37-40 are just extra “cooking” time. Our doctor has informed us that each day she stays inside the womb is 3 days less in the NICU. So, we are praying that my blood pressure stays normal for a couple of more weeks!

There was talk about inducing me this past Thursday because my blood pressure was crazy high. I am not going to lie, that terrified Ryan and I. It completely caught us off guard. We thought we would be going home as soon as my BP was normal. Even though it is hard being here, we are thankful for nurses and doctors that are monitoring everything so closely.

They gave me steroid shots that will help develop Finley’s lungs in case we do deliver early. I have also been given BP medicine in hopes that it will regulate my BP. Finley looks great. She got a 10/10 yesterday at our appointment. So, all we’re doing now is waiting to see what my BP does. We could deliver this next weekend at 34 weeks. It is still a little early but better than 33 weeks. I could also wait until 37 weeks if my BP regulates. It is all just a waiting game now. But the wonderful thing about all of this is that The Lord knows what is going to happen. He already has everything planned out. He knows exactly when Finley will make her debut. Ryan and I have so much peace knowing that The Lord is in control.

Pregnancy has been nothing what I thought it would be like, but it is an experience that I wouldn’t trade for the world. It is wonderful. There have been so many unexpected twists and turns. Being in the hospital at 33 weeks never even crossed my mind. I went to the doctor on Thursday expecting to check my BP and then go back to work. Well, 5 days later, I am still in the hospital. Despite all of this not being what I had planned, I am thankful for a growing baby girl! I know I have said this time and time again, but God is constantly revealing to me that I do not have to have everything planned out. I think this is His way of telling me to slow down.

Again, we want to thank everyone for all of the prayers. We are so blessed to have so much love and support. I will keep you updated as we know more!

xoxo,

Alyssa Littlefield